"My dear enemy, I won't rest even the time of eye-blinking before you tell me, which of these scietistic men is my father."
"But what can I say? None of them is you father - I am!"
"Nooooooooo! I cannot be the son Milkyways autocrat!"
"And even your name isn't real. My darling, Steve, shall I call you Luke."
"What?! I can't take this anymore.."
"Wanna know more about yourself? Your birthday is really on the 7th December, your mothers name isn't Diana; it's Lucy."
"WHAT THE-?!! My aunt?!"
"Yess, inceset isn't forbidden in the Dark Side."
"I think, I'm going to vomit.."
"And, by the way, the beef you ate today - it wasn't cow; it was chicken."

Evil laugh, the sound of fainting.

The End of Luke Croft: ex-tomb raider.